i am soooo damn dam pissed off right now .
the stupid fucking idiot head chef .
alrights the story shall beginning .
lets sit back and listen .
normally i everyday after my meals i will go up to my rm and hav a puff ,
but they (the chefs) supposely doesn't know i go up puff .
then today as usual i went up .
then when i came down .
my manager told me nicely .
next time after meal dun go up puff .
then he said .
the head chef scolded him and throw a big temper .
the manager then said its her own freedom what .
dam him ( i mean the stupid chef lah) .
the manager so hao shen hao qi tell him .
he throw what fucking temper .
but i dunno how he knows
perhaps another stupid fucking china person aka xiao mei tell him de .
then i went to ask ivy(my closest collugues here) what had actually happen .
she told me after i went up,
the head chef ask the manager to tell me not to come up puff after meal ,
he scared i will burnt down the fucking hse .
dam him .
my things are right in the rm lor !
if reali caught a fire, my things wil be gonez first lor !
then the manager told him,
i will tell her to put off the cig carefully .
then the stupid chef throw temper liao .
and then the manager said .
its her own freedom what! i also got smoke lei .
then .
ever since the stupid chef gave me black face .
and i just now nvr see him behind the door mopping,
so i push the door .
i dunno whether got bang into him anot .
then he said pig leg .
fuck lor !
then just now .
my place "flood"
cause heavy rain .
then the sink in the bar flooded .
then we so bz carrying the water out lor .
i almost slipped .
then the stupid chef dunno say what again .
dam lor .
today so tired liao .
he still so kp .
i reali very angry lor .
i dunno why he can because of such a small matter,
behave like a one yr old kid lor .
if i nvr see him as a head chef,
i will pour out my vulgars in front of him liao .
pui~
head chef dua sai ah !
dam !
ahh !
sweating like fuck .
then my clothes still outside .
now wet like shit lor .
think i not going to kip inside liao .
cause i bringing to my uncle hse to wash .
dunno why the pants i wash so smelly .
they say cause nvr let the sun shine until my clothes .
then i put my clothes in my rm .
no air - vendilation .
and hor .
ivy have two days off lor .
meaning tmr and tues cannot see her liao .
sobs .
gonna miss her .
and hor .
i ahve decided to buy one LV wallet and a gucci bag liao .
if got extra money i then buy something else .
hee .
the tips so little this week lor .
sigh .
if i could save 200 pounds every week .
i will be laughing away liaoz .
haiz .
doubt so .
but no choice .
gg back liao .
cannot anyhow spend .
anw .
felt so much better after i type this entry .
and i am reali very hot .
arggx .
and sticky .
worst .
miss dar so much .
muackz

it is a blessing to be in love .
esp .
when someone is ur mr right .
and .
i saw a question on angelia blog .
i reali feel tt right now .
is to immediately meet dar when i am back .
nt when i am free .
cause miss dar so much .
ytd slept early .
at about 1am .
so tired .
just fell asleep .
and my com too hot .
burning .
and auto-shut .
so might as well go slp .
and now is raining cats and dogs .
called dad just now .
glad to hear they are fine .
and i told him to tell my bro help me find job .
hopefully can start work after 1 week when i get back .
dun wanna waste anymore time .
then gonna study at night .
like my dad said .
i am still young .
if i regret not studying last time, its not too late .
hopefully .
can still study now to make up .
ok lah .
i go talk to dar then need to work liao .

why .
why .
why .
u used to tag me often at my blog .
but now .
u dun bother .
haiz .
why .
why .
but anw .
today afternoon had a nice and funny talk with dar .
just when i finish my work .
is reali just when lor .
then dar call me .
and tell me excitedly .
dear i found a phone i like ler .
zzz .
he win liao .
suddenly call me to tell me tt .
then he says .
who is there available for him when he wants someone immediately .
me loh .
then i say his friendster cha bo lah .
he say who , me loh .
he said i am the first one he came to his mind to share with .
lols .
reali happy to hear tt loh .
then i tell dar .
u wanna me buy for u ah .
he say no ,
i wan u buy lappy for me .
wahs .
he very de greedy lor .
haha .
stupid dar .
knock his head then he know .
then hor .
he still laughing at the other side lor .
zzz .

a "nan-de" de talk lor .
haha .
dar reali make me laugh and angry lor .
told him about the LV bag i saw .
cost me 1200 pounds .
the reaction from him is expected .
lols .
ok lah .
i tired le .
waanna close eye liao .

i saw both gucci and LV things i like le .
yuppy .
sure 100% get them b4 i come back .
probably the LV next week .
well well well .
dar woke up at 4am today .
poor him .
sayang .
muackz .
but he reali pig!
slp lesser cannot de lor .
zhuxzhuz .
tag me lei dar .
so obvious hint liao lor .
if still no tag or comment, i angry le .
hmmpz .
=p

李圣杰 - 靠近
by:林潞平 QQ 404170961
走在人挤人的走道 我问了自已
没有爱情的人是否会长命
那些电影常常让人感觉甜蜜
但是我不相信
坐在没有人的角落 我又问自已
究竟应该继续 还是该放弃
没有人能了解我 现在的心情
想看你 想躲你 难以决定
每当我想靠近 你总会装冷静
眼看你的表情 仿佛已经说明
我只想要证明 我们这段爱情
也许在你眼里 它只是个游戏
我只想要靠近 也很想要抱紧
会想到那过去 和现在新的你
我还想要参与 你的生活点滴
只要你肯相信
我一定会陪你走下去
坐在没有人的角落 我又问自已
究竟应该继续 还是该放弃
没有人能了解我 现在的心情
想看你 想躲你 难以决定
每当我想靠近 你总会装冷静
眼看你的表情 仿佛已经说明
我只想要证明 我们这段爱情
也许在你眼里 它只是个游戏
我只想要靠近 也很想要抱紧
会想到那过去 和现在新的你
我还想要参与 你的生活点滴
只要你肯相信
我一定会陪你走下去
能不能够让我 再说我爱你
还是你已不想听
能不能够把你 彻底的忘记
我是真的搞不清
每当我想靠近 你总会装冷静
眼看你的表情 仿佛已经说明
我只想要证明 我们这段爱情
也许在你眼里 它只是个游戏
我只想要靠近 也很想要抱紧
会想到那过去 和现在新的你
我还想要参与 你的生活点滴
只要你肯相信
我一定会陪你走下去
只要你再相信
我们会轻轻地靠在一起

不要在我寂寞的时候说爱我
演唱：T.R.Y
LRC：东子 于11/17深夜制作
QQ：287225772 东~飘游~子
柔柔的晚风轻轻吹过
我的心情平静而寂寞
当我想忘记爱情去勇敢生活
是谁到我身边唱起了情歌
当初的爱情匆匆走过
除了伤口没留下什么
你总是在我寂寞流泪的时候
用你的双臂紧紧抱着我
不要在我寂寞的时候说爱我
除非你真的能给予我快乐
那过去的伤总在随时提醒我
别再被那爱情折磨
不要在我哭泣的时候说爱我
除非你真的不让我难过
我不想听太多那虚假的承诺
让我 为爱再次后悔
犯下的错
当初的爱情匆匆走过
除了伤口没留下什么
你总是在我寂寞流泪的时候
用你的双臂紧紧抱着我
不要在我寂寞的时候说爱我
除非你真的能给予我快乐
那过去的伤总在随时提醒我
别再被那爱情折磨
不要在我哭泣的时候说爱我
除非你真的不让我难过
我不想听太多那虚假的承诺
让我 为爱再次后悔
犯下的错
不要在我寂寞的时候说爱我
除非你真的能给予我快乐
那过去的伤总在随时提醒我
别再被那爱情折磨
不要在我哭泣的时候说爱我
除非你真的不让我难过
我不想听太多那虚假的承诺
让我为爱再次后悔
犯下的错
在爱的世界里
没有谁对不起谁
只有谁不懂得珍惜谁
爱要掌握好方式
才能不会让双方受到伤害
有时候,默默的付出
是一种爱的最好表达方式
因为或许就在某一天
她会切实的明白这一切...

both are such a nice song .

男女之间
作词：黄舒骏 / 作曲：黄舒骏
女人最怕男人是一堆沙猪
男人最怕女人脑袋像浆糊
女人通常都是感情的动物
男人大半都是生活的侏儒
女人可以爱到义无反顾 男人只能爱到相当程度
女人失恋容易另寻出路 男人失恋可就万劫不复男女之间永远说不清楚 互相厌恶又互相追逐
女人失恋容易另寻出路 男人失恋可就万劫不复男女之间永远说不清楚 互相厌恶又互相追逐
彼此可以找出千万个错误 却是五十步笑百步女人对爱要求需索无度 男人总是显得马马虎虎
彼此可以找出千万个错误 却是五十步笑百步女人对爱要求需索无度 男人总是显得马马虎虎
女人好不容易决定开始 男人却好像刚要结束女人的泪可以融化冰雪
女人好不容易决定开始 男人却好像刚要结束女人的泪可以融化冰雪
男人的哭却是山崩地裂
女人的坚强是金石不如
男人的温柔是沧海一粟
女人的胸前是男人的家
男人的肩膀是女人的床
女人希望男人像一棵大树
男人渴望的是精神支柱男女之间永远说不清楚 互相厌恶又互相追逐
男人渴望的是精神支柱男女之间永远说不清楚 互相厌恶又互相追逐
彼此可以找出千万个错误 却是五十步笑百步女人说谎保证是天衣无缝
彼此可以找出千万个错误 却是五十步笑百步女人说谎保证是天衣无缝
男人说谎终究是百密一疏
女人懂得演戏是一种天赋
男人永远败在经验不足
WOO......
男人渴望的是精神支柱男女之间永远说不清楚 互相厌恶又互相追逐
彼此可以找出千万个错误 却是五十步笑百步女人说谎保证是天衣无缝
女人认为爱情是一种付出
男人总是把它当作一种征服
女人好不容易决定开始
男人却好像刚要结束
女人好不容易决定开始
男人却好像刚要结束

this song is dar recommend to me . and sing to me indirectly . lols . i know he dun mean to sing to me . but this is the first time i heard him sing .

i have been reali missing dar alot .
and i know he does .
just that he dun express it out .
dar, i understand .
i reali understand .
our road and future is still long ahead .
we will walk thru tgr .

oh ya .
i more and more cannot communicate with china girls liao .
dunno wtf they angry about lor .
i just talk to customers .
they wan to chat with me .
what to do .
and then the f***ing china girls angry .
_|_
dun say lerx lahz .
luckily here have one girl i can communicate with .
haha .
we quite close lor .
=) .
13 more weeks .
just tolerate bahz .
yi zhuan yan pass ler .

ok lah .
i go surf web le .
tata .

my dar is more and moer like a silly dar .
lols .
anw .
b4 i get to the story .
i dunno leis .
recently been dreaming of dar and his family .
lols .
weird .
anyway .
dar copy me lor !
he copy me say dunno lei .
but he say in chi .
zzz .
he win le .
then hor .
just now he looks like very bz ma .
then i tell him i dun disturb him le .
then he explain to me .
and gave me the person msn and friendster link .
lols .
and ask me not to bully her .
cause she is his only mei .
i said if i bully her, he kill me ah .
then he says he knw i wun bully her de .
lols .
silly dar .
i was smiling while i typing this entry and just now lor .
haha .
miss dar alots leix .
sobx .
oh ya .
the dreams .
i always din get to see dar real face de .
always blur blur de .
sobs .
12 more weeks .
and i wun be here working le .
haha .
then gg to play for one week b4 i go back to sg .
13 more weeks !!!
whee .
reali so happy .
i wonder will dar give me any surprise at the airport or when i go back .
dun think he will lor .
he so dumb dumb de .
haiz .
lols .

din update my blog for so long .
probably a few days ler .
WARNING: LONG LONG LONG LONG POST
well .
i had my off on mon .
hence i went to my uncle hse on sun night .
by bus .
and .
i got to the wrong bus - stop .
the driver said walked straight .
then i walk .
so quiet and dark .
freaking scared out of me .
saw this nice soul and ask her .
told me .
then my bus came .
but ...
the freaking bus driver cannot see me .
wth .
i think i too short or perhaps i wearing black thats why .
dam .
so scared no more bus le .
cause the bus here end early on sunday de .
almost cry .
then heng .
the last bus came .
and brought to my destination safe .
whee .
reached my uncle shop .
saw so many things gone .
then realised they had sold the shop .
22nd sept passing to the new boss .
well well well .
3 more weeks when i go ,
i will be staying at his hse le .
seeing my couz so cute ,
cannot have the heart to leave uk .
lols .
then i suggest ,
throw my ticket away .
haha .
crazy suggestion .
i came back only on tues mornign .
woke up at 830 .
but almost got lost again .
cause the freaking bus dun go to my destination .
f***
oh well .
i met nice souls telling me where to take .
hee .
got my place at 1030 .
f***
so late lor .
30 mins late for work .
oh well .
then .
as usual my daily routines .
oh ya .
ytd i dreamt of dar and his aunt .
lols .
his aunt ask him to ask me to play mj with them .
dar also got play .
form 6 - 9 .
haha .
weird dream .
ask dar is he happy with me .
he said lol , ya happy .
ask him why happy .
he said dunno lei . just happy .
told him ask u like machiam nvr ask lor .
then he laugh .
he ah .
always like to make me angry de lor .
told him i die u happy ah .
he laugh and said no ah .
told me whether wan me go back early or late .
he paused and said of cause early lah but i dun wan u waste money .
silly dar .
lols .
told me he searching at e-bay for eee-pc .
haha .
i feel lk laughing .
silly dar again .
lols .
he always so silly de .
but thats what i love him about .
hee .
ok lah .
so long le .
dun write liao .
hope tmr can talk to dar on msn .
mayb video .
so long nvr see him le .
sobx .
muackz .
who can tell me whether am i xin fu .
even if nobody ,
i myself feel i am very xin fu to have this silly dar .
my future laogong .
muackz .
love him lots .
recently our future have been always on my mind .
which i had ever happen b4 .
our kids, us and our family are so happy tgr .
haha .
oh ya .
my aunt and uncles know about dar le .
i told them about him .
and they so curious .
say next time go back sg muz let them see .
lols .
first time they so curious about my bf de .
perhaps they can hear from my tone that i am very serious this time round ba .
cause i told them i wanna settle down with him and plan for the future le .
i not young anymore .
if wan to marry and have kids, got to do it early,
while we still have strength .
hee .
go wash clothes liao .
tata .

dar explained to me .
everything is fine .
haha .
his new epson printer gave him probs .
his com cannot detect his printer .
haha .
he so pekcek .
sorry dar .
i have always think too much .
our time different are too big .
i shld have understand tt long time ago .
i am so sorry .
muackz .
thankz for giving in to me time again and again .
thankz for not giving up on us .
dar .
i love u .
ytd u hit ur head against a sharp corner twice .
is ur head alrights?
got buy the rubber mahz ?
u take carez wor .
dun blur blur de .
haha .
3 more mths .
exactly 3 more mths .
i will be on the plane to sg le .
i reali reali reali reali look forward .
so happy .
the first thing i will do ,
if i saw dar is to huggy him .
if he comes to the airport and fetch me lahz .
hope so .
haha .
dar just reformatted his com .
so cannot msn him .
i dunno whether is it true or not .
but i am happy .
cause at least dar will call me and talk to me .
and i have no more credit in my phone .
i cannot sms him .
sigh .
wanted to talk longer to him .
but seeing him soooo busy .
with his bloody hell printer and com .
and he so pekcek .
cause i noe if i continue talk to him and listen to his pekcek voice .
i will be angry .
then start to quarrel .
so .
i just hang up .
wanted him to concentrate too .
then can slp early .
cause he nd to wake up early .
he seldom stay up so late .
hope everyone is a r/s are doing fine .
and stay loving always .
dun give up on each other .

the opposite of love is not HATE .
is indifference .
lols .
i learn it from parental guidance II .
its a nice show .
starring adrian pang and xuan xuan .
is at channel 5 .
i think it has ended liao .
ta .
i go watch teng xin feng bao II lerx .
cya .
muackz .
miss ya .
love ya .
oh ya .
so happy going my uncle hse later .
hee .

i dunno whether u got read my blog anot .
cause u dun say anything or do anything sigh .
what u wan .
can u say clearly .
sigh .
ps i love u .

i dunno .
once again .
i know dar have been putting in effort .
but .
we dun get to talk everyday for 1 min .
either on msn, phone or sms .
haiz .
our feelings like fading .
i dunno .
i tot that since sat or sun he wun be working .
he will not slp tt early .
but .
haiz .
he doesn't seems to treasure our times .
i mean able to talk times .
haiz .
i feel so low down lor .
will he ever understand my deep down feelings .
i got so much to talk to him .
to share .
but .
he is always not available for me .
sigh .
this is not what i want .
i am tired .
dar .
if u love me,
pls do something ok .
i reali do love u .
but dun make me feel tired about this r/s .
pls .
suan le .
i dun care .
if that is how u show me u love me,
then let it be .
if u wan to treat me hot and cold whenever u like,
then let it be .
i am too exhausted of everything else .

why .
why dar nvr encourage me when i wanna stop smoking .
i din smoke the whole day le lor .
well .
i mean till now lah .
haha .
do a great job .
hmmx .
luckily .
i am not too addicted to smoking .
or else i will be very tough lor .
haha .
anw .
so full .
just eaten dinner .
i am thinking what present to get for that silly dar of mine .
hee .
surprise .
not gonna let anyone knows .
i reali have the urge of going back lor .
haiz .
dar dun wan me to waste money .
so he ask me to ren .
haiz .
i can ren how long lor !!!
arggx .

its been 2 days i have yet to blog .
well .
actually there is nth much to blog lor .
my life have been always the same here .
boring lor .
ytd 4 then slp .
now so sleepy .
i no more cig .
no more money to buy .
well .
perhaps thats the best way to quit smoking .
mayb i will just give my money to my uncle .
and .
just kip 10 pounds by my side .
is it a good idea huh .
i dunno lah .
reali miss darling so much lor .
hai .
i wanna go back now .
arggx .
anw .
i blog during my brk .
hee .
gtg le .
tataz .
love u darling forever .
oh ya .
dar .
u haven tell me ur chi name lor .
ask u 3 times liaox lor .

i am so in love every single day .
tho can't meet dar .
tho can't talk to dar .
but the love from him i can feel it .
i am getting used to him say "la" .
lols .
every sentence he say he will add a "la" .
weird dar .
but alrights lah .
reali hope we can last long and ever .
i just love him so much .
lols .
anw .
talking about my work .
i realise my work isn't that bad afterall lah .
cause hor .
i finish work at 10+ or 11 lo .
the timing still alrights lahs .
hahas .
then got free wireless .
what i expect lor .
gotta buy slippers to wear in the hostel .
sian .
but i think that i need to wash my clothes by hands i more sianz lor .
haiz .
dar went to watch money not enough 2 .
i wonder nice anot .
dar tell me nice anot when we talk online the next time okie .
i tummy ache le .
haiz .
so poo poo .
cya .
muackz .
miss u dar .
lots lots .
i wonder does dar miss me as much as i did anot .
haiz .

new place .
i am at my new working place le .
the rm has one word to describe .
sux .
totally sux .
imagine u are sleeping in a storeroom .
and i just kill a spider just above my head .
zzz .
imagine the spider appear when i am sleeping .
and i swollow it .
kao .
and the worst is there is no nearby laundry shop .
i need to wash my clothes by hands .
and is dam fucking lots lor .
haiz .
dunno how lah .
reali regret coming here .
go to the boss sister shop good lah .
come here for what .
hours fucking long .
start at 10 .
and end at 2 .
then start at 4 .
and end at 11 .
wah lao lor .
the longest working time i ever worked .
boo .
but luckily i ask my boss for the internet pw .
then got internet .
or else i will cry de lor .
haiz .
rm sux, everything sux .
if no internet, i rather go my uncle place to help for cheap labour lor .
haiz .
at least there, i can eat my auntie or uncle cooking .
nicer lor .
haiz .
slp with my aunty .
the best is .
the rm is clean and have wireless lor .
haha .
but too bad .
3 mths .
i have to endure this .
wah lao .
can die .
how .

now i at my uncle hse playing internet .
lols .
just now dar so funny lor .
i mean long time ago lah .
few hrs ago .
he told me he wanna go slp le .
then studdenly 1 hr later he call me .
and tell me .
he rmb the song he wants le .
lols !
he win liao .
haha .
but hor .
he not rmb the song title lei .
he rmb the tone lor .
zzz .
then hor .
omw to my uncle hse .
i talk to dar on the phone .
he so funny ask me one question .
u sitting MRT like sg de or choo choo huo che (train) .
lols .
the way he ask me .
so funny lor .
i mean the way he say choo choo train in chi .
lols !!!!!!!
hahhaa .
dar always put in effort .
but hor .
sometimes
i like to hear sweet things from u de leis .
heex .
so say to me lahs .
dun always me tell u then u say .
i will sianz =.=""
then he says love u and miss u need to everytime remind de meh .
then he says everytime remind u like very fake lei .
lols .
he win liao .
but .
i still love him so much even without reminding me .
but i love u hear .
=p
miss my dar so much .
tmr gg to my new place to work le .
haiz .
starting work think ard 10am .
so early lor .
haiz .

suddenly .
my brain has one big drumstick .
lols .
lols .
lols .
i suddenly wanna eat hainan chicken rice !
lols .
i am crazy .
i am so lazy .
dun wan to move at all .
nvr bath .
lols .
but gg to my uncle hse to bath tmr .
so nvmx lah .
lols .
dun care .
lols .
lazy .
haha .
just now boss treat us eat kabaab .
i nvr eat .
but i ate donat chicken .
ehh .
so nan chi lor !
lols .
not my taste .
pui~
so fast .
today my last day liao .
haiz .
ppl come and go come and go .
cannot be so sad .
like ytd .
one of my driver .
he have 2 twins de .
then he came to buy dinner with his gf and babies in the car lor .
then i told him i wanna see the baby .
he dun wan carry out .
then hor .
i dunno why .
i wanna cry .
i told him tmr last day liao .
then he says come out and see lah .
but hor later i see i sure cry de .
so i say nvm .
dun wan see liao .
haiz .
the ppl here are so nice .
the computer, laundry, the indian shop, etc .
all so nice and friendly to me .
all my drivers told me they will miss me when i am gone .
cause i always play ard with them .
joke ard .
they say they will miss my laughter .
aw~
sad to hear lor .
reali wanna cry .
but nvm lahs .
if can, i will come back lor .
but i dun think so lah .
lols .
cause my 2 previous jobs i say i will come back one day .
but hor .
so long liao .
nvr even go back .
lols .
then my boss ask me i found job liao ma .
i say i go on holiday .
then he says if i come back, and he needs ppl, i then come help ok .
i say ok lor .
haha .
first time a boss will tell me like tt .
what it stand for?
the most let me she bu de is my collugues lor .
2 mths tgr leh .
not easy .
lols .
6 more hrs and i will be gonez here .
and arrive in another new place of uk .
haha .
reali travelling ard uk man .
miss my dardar soo sooo soo much .
but hor .
he like dun miss me de lor .
sobx .
he lk doesn't wan to talk to me more .
he rather slp or watch tv then to talk to me lor .
haiz .
haiz.
very sad and disappointed

LOL .
just now dar suddenly tell me i better stop smoking .
i tot what happen .
chey .
then he told me about the rules and laws .
saying in future sg no longer can smoke le .
muz hide and smoke .
and gave me an article to see .
zzz .
so bo liao .
but hor .
dar .
i dun intend to smoke when i get back .
unless u want me to .
=)
haha .
so excited .
gonna pay for my balance for my tix le .
and evrything is 100% chop .
lols .
so happy .
yaya .
cannot wait to get my e-ticket lor .
then i can 201% go back liao .
hahahaha .
hahaha .
the more i think i more i am excited .
sigh .
i and dar cannot have a nice chat de lor .
either is i will be working or he is busy with dunno what .
dun wan to ask too much .
later he not happy .
then just now unable to contact my parents make me so worried .
haiz .
hav a funny feeling .
but my mum assured me nth had happen .
but .
things are weird .
she said my dad went for 2 days lesson .
for renewing of license .
weird .
i dunno lah .
haiz .
worried .
mayb they dun wan me worry tts why they say nth had happen .
but if something reali bad happen,
i hope they could tell me the truth .
haiz .
bless them .
shld i fly back early ?
haiz .
i dunno .
sad .

i dunno is it a sad or happy thing .
i am not gg to the new place ler .
but i am still leaving here on sun .
to some other places .
working in a restaurant .
my uncle found me a job .
just 30 mins bus ride to his hse .
hmms .
think quite near .
dun care la .
3 mths nia .
tt time i work in that restaurant .
i rmb abt 1 mth later i wanted to resign .
but who knows .
i ren and ren and ren .
work there for about a yr liao .
lols .
haha .
so i think this restaurant job will b my last one b4 i fly back .
hmm .
gotta work hard .
cause as usual .
my basic will pass to my uncle
and i will spend only on tips .
so hopefully tips more more .
then i happy happy lo .
dar ytd slp nvr give me goodnight kiss .
sobs .
so unsensitive de him .
haha .
but hor .
this few days .
he reali make me so happy .
lols .
everytime try to make me laugh .
lols .
can't eager to see him and spend our time tgr .
muackz .
oh ya .
tdy my collugue so dam and serve him right .
he kanna con .
lols .
cause at night there are 2 young guys came to our shop and ask wan to buy hp anot .
and he show a N73 and another model (nvr see clearly)
i noe either is fake or stolen de lor .
so i said no i dun wan, go away .
then hor .
they left liao lor .
my collugue went to chase them .
cause he wan to buy .
and somemore the guys selling n73 for 20 pound nia lor .
whr got so fucking cheap de .
then no charger no nth lor .
i keep telling him dun buy .
but he nvr listen .
so after work, he borrow my charger wanna see whether the phone is working anot .
who noes .
the phone is fake .
no batt de .
lols .
and the charger cannot even pluck inside .
serve him right lor .
then he keep scolding .
wah lao .
so tan siao pian yi for what lor .
haha .
but hor .
i have the temptation to buy also leh .
but hor clever and wise enuff .
nvr waste my money .
they are so precious .
lols .
ok lah .
i go slp le .
nono .
watch show le .
nights .
muackz dar .

today i am sleeping early .
cause i noe dar wil be bz working .
and wun have time to sms or call me .
so nvm .
and i am so tired .
cause .
sleeping late recently .
sigh .
so sleepy .
i yet to bath ok .
and hor .
no show to watch .
haiz .
sianz diaoz .
hopefully tmr can talk to dar lor .
hee .
reali very happy with him .
realli miss dar so much .
can he feel it anot .
haiz .
did he miss me?
mayb i shld start taking things easy .
watch too many show liao .
startin to imagine things le .
lols .
dunno lah .
haiz .
tummy hurting lor .
haiz .
wonder what eat wrong .
haiz .
dunno lah .
lols .
dar said i always say dunno, what else i noe .
lols .
he ah .
sometimes reali make me so angry lor .
dunno wan to laugh or angry .
lols .
but he change le .
he will not humor me .
lols .
with stupid lame jokes lah .
haha .
=.="
just loving him bits .
he is the one i wan to spend my life with .
he is the one i wan to marry 2 yrs later .
he is the father of my kids .
and he is the grandfather of our kids .
lols .
siao liao .
later he sure say me de ,
aiya .
die liao .
i think when i go back i will still smoke leh .
how ah .
oppx .
dar sure scold me de .
hee .
dunno lah .
like nw i no more cig liao hor .
so urge to smoke lor .
haiz .
used to it le .
cause every night sure smoke ard this time .
esp when i watching show or blogging de .
die lah .
if go back still smoke, i mati lor .
haiz .
dunno lah .

just feeling so happy every single day .
when someone is in love .
she will be happy naturally .
lols .
just like me .
i and dar planned so many things to do when i get back .
haha .
so many until i dunno whr to start from .
lols .
miss dar .
muackz .
and hor .
he not zi dong de lor .
i say so long nvr kiss kiss .
he then give me lor .
sobs .

so many things going on my mind .
what the first thing i do when i reach sg .
probably hope M1 or Singtel haven close .
then can go and sign line .
if not temp get my mum line for tt night first lor .
when i get home .
dunno they can fetch me anot lah .
dar said he will come and fetch me .
dunno real anot lah .
later i ended up alone .
lolx .
2 hands with so many luggage lor .
had a good time talking to dar .
he half wake half slp de .
blur blur de .
like me also .
actually woke at 9am but dun wanna disturb him .
so went back rest .
till 10am .
then miss call him .
hee .
then hor .
he kip saying abt food lor .
make me so hungry .
tummy grumbling liao lor .
sobs .
but still not eating .
oh ya .
i have slimmed again .
lolz .
so happy .
gg to be slimmer again .
probably go for slimming course when i get back .
but dar sure wun agree de lor .
lols .
miss my dar lots lots .

miss him lots right now .
lazy to bath .
lazy to move .
its alrdyx 2.30am .
yet i have not bath .
lolx .
smelly .
reali lazy lor .
tired .
so tired .
but gonna force myself to bath soon .
hmmx .
its been cfm i am gg to my new place ler .
i wonder there have wireless anot .
hopefully have lor .
or else i die liao lor .
haiz .
dunno lei .
3mths no internet .
wah lao eh .
imagine 3 mths cannot blog .
cannot talk to him .
i can die .
haiz .
sux .
sux .
everything sux .
ahhh .
so emo now lor .

short notes about him .
to everyone .
he may not be the most handsome guy in the world .
he may not be the richest guy in the world .
he may not be the loving guy in the world .
he may not be the most caring guy in the world .
he may not be the more muscular guy in the world .
he may not say i love u everyday .
he may not be able to express out his love .
but .
to me .
he is the most handsome guy .
the most loving and caring guy .
at least without any fail .
he will read my blog .
know my updates .
none .
none of my ex will do that by automatic .
i am reali surprise .
mayb he too bored .
but at least when he bored, he will think of reading .
he explain ytd the call by himself .
lolx .

i so much wanted to make him happy everyday .
haha .
wanted to dote him like a little prince of mine .
but .
money and distance .
when i get back .
i will let him feel he is the most fortunate guy .
and i will be the most fortunate girl .
cause this yr .
i am going to give him a christmas present .
he said nobody ever gave him a present .
and i am going to give him a big present .
i knew he will like it for sure .
i love him from head to toe .
lolx .
tho his tummy can be quite big .
but it is very perfect .
cause when i cold, i can hug him .
and i will feel warm .
hee .
reali feel so eager to go back lor .
haiz .
hopefully when i wake up tmr,
it is alrdy nov .
how i wish it will be .
darling .
i will be ur santa claus .
i can't give u much lurxous .
but i will try my best .
love u .
muackz .
thankx for everything .
ur tolerance .
no more of the history .
all we have is now and future .

as days pass,
it means so many things .
one = i am leaving this place soon .
second = i am getting my e-tickets soon .
third = i am buying m y gucci wallet .
forth = i am flying back to sg my hometown !!
fifth = i got to see him finally .
every single thing is just so happy and exciting for me .
can't believe i will get a gucci wallet with the money i earn and work for .
perhaps cannot buy any LV bag liao lor .
haiz .
nvm lah .
not everyone suits to get a LV bag .
nice nice bag like GUESS or what brand also can for me .
hee .
just gonna get one for cny next yr .
thats a muz .
gonna doll up .
haha .
cny .
oh ya .
SIXTH = x'mas
Seventh = CNY
EIGHTH = V'day
NINTH = My b'day
wow .
lolx .
i am crazy of going back lor .
reali dam farking crazy .
and exciting .
but now .
all i can hope is .
i dun leave this lovely place .
sobs .
in the afternoon,
i cried .
he said some silly lame joke .
lolx .
tho they dun reali help .
but i am happy in my heart .
he tried to make me laugh .
lolx .
had a nice time talking .
just tt i dunno why .
i think i am jealous .
just abt he gg to slp,
i heard him talking to someone sweetly .
i presume its a girl .
so i got upset .
but he is not my bf anymore .
why muz i am so upset .
haiz .
and i shld be happy .
cause .
we contacted back .
=)

he told me he got read my blog .
i am still reading my blog .
lolx .
kanna surprise .
tot he wun bother anything about me anymore .
lolx .
then he knows i will be reaching sg at 25 nov le .
lolx .
haha .
and he say he will come and fetch me at the airport lor .
still got 3 mths .
so long way to go lor .
haha .
then say ba .
aiya .
dunno lah .
having headache .

i dunno why .
why does someone will regret into making decisions .
haiz .
the someone is like me .
i regret so many things in my whole life .
now i am 22 yr old .
i missed so many things .
haiz .
why am i so chong dong .
haiz .
why .
haiz .
can things go back to the same .
i dunno .
i regretted what i sms him ytd night .
haiz .
i dun wan to lose him .
i promised to myself to stay by him .
maybe is because of long distance thats why we are like that .
i should not be so negative .
i am so sorry about everything of i had done .
i am a farker .
haiz .
why do i wan to throw temper like tt .
haiz .
i wonder how is he now .
weather is hot .
has he drank more water .
is his cold getting better .
i know its tired of him .
to wake up early in the morning to work .
haiz .
why can't i be more understanding in the past .
now till i had lost him
then i start to cherish every single part of it .
haiz .
if he saw this post,
hopefully can give me a sms .
telling me whether can we be tgr once again .
i will change .
i reali will .
i dun wan to lose him .
we had so many common things .
if we had feelings,
and stand beside each other .
i believe we have a long journey ahead .
i want to spend every yr of birthday, x'mas, v'day with him .
and only him .
till my last breathe .
i rmb he told me b4 .
he will love me till his very last breathe .
i rmb it clearly .
its touching .
cause he is not those sweet talk guy .
but .
i din treasure .
everyone has their good and bad points .
and everyone is different .
when i am not perfect,
how can i hope to find a perfect guy .
sigh .

well .
this is the first time i hated someone so much .
like what they say .
the more u love someone .
the more u will hate someone .
well .
forget it .
haha .
now all i hope is to faster get back to sg .
my hometown .
i am not lack of suitors .
lolx .
there are guys waiting for me to get back tho .
so why muz i be upset over such a farker .
haha .
my life is just the same .
lolx .
so sad .
cannot watch NDP .
my network too slow .
moreoever .
i need to work soon liao lor .
haiz .
sad .
happy birthday singapore .
old old singapore .
my family so much wanted me to stay in uk longer .
but well .
too bad .
i have bought the tickets .
and is unrefundable .
haiz .
nvmx .
all can blame is my chong dong ba .
i deleted his number, msn, friendster .
i dun wan to do anything with him .
any guys to intro me .
kanna bored .
lols .
tata
work time!

happy birthday .
to singapore, my homeland .
to kenny .
singapore my homeland,
thats where i belong .
living in singapore for 21 yrs (1 yr i am at uk living) .
singapore is such a nice country .
sometimes i dun understand why there are ppl complaining abt singapore lor .
just that the ERP and GST are getting higher and higher each time .
i wonder will the price drop??
lolx .
too bad .
cannot see NDP 2008 live .
so i managed to ask daddy to tape it down for me .
i believe it is an unforgettable performance .
like it is every single yr .
haha .
i love the fireworks .
too bad .
but here,
there are fireworks everywhere .
its cheap to get one .
lols .
so bored and its not nice lor .
cheap things whr got nice de .
anw,
singapore how old liao ah .
hee .
i forget le .
how could i be a singaporean .
i think .
think only huh .
43??
think so lah huh .
lols .

my network is so lousy .
so slow .
suck .
i am praying everyday .
hopefully the new girl doesn't want to work here .
then i could stay!
how perfect .
how wonderful .
lols .
cause i am going back soon .
it makes no diff .
lols .

mayb u nvr read my blog le .
nvm .
but just wish u all the best .
if we have fate or still have feelings when i get back,
then we can get tgr again .
if not,
then too bad .
haha .
i will be happy .
try to .
at least huh .
the most happy thing is .
i am going back soon !!!
whaha !!
reaching sg in the evening .
the date will be in a secret .
but anw .
i will say cause nobody is reading .
and its 3 mths to the date .
lolx .
i will be reaching sg on the 25th of nov in the evening .
sigh .
i guess nobody will be receiving me .
haiz .
poor girl .
but nvm .

does leo and pisces reali dun match .
sigh .
who can ans me .
perhaps when i go back,
i will ask guan yin niang niang about my fate and life .
she is so true .

life is so short and fragile .
cherish what u have by ur side .
by the time u realize it,
everything is too late .
just like me .
haha .
want to cherish also cannot liao .
haha .
hahaha .
perhaps will cherish the time with my family .

he is gonez .
we are finish .
our fate has ended right from ytd night .
deleted his number and all the msges .
u said i am still ur gf .
i dun feel it at all .
i will treat it as i nvr met u b4 .
i nvr got to know u .
everything is a dream .
and the dream is officially ended .

sigh .
what are we now .
what are u up to .
why can't we be just the same like last time .
sigh .
missed the short 1 week .
its nice and sweet .
sigh .
perhaps everything is too late .
too late for everything .
perhaps i meant to be lonely .
left on the shelf .
sigh .
body is weak .
mind is weak .
heart is weaker .

i dun feel happy at all going back to sg .
haiz .
dead gal .
i am dead .

just discharged from hospital .
feeling so weak .
haiz .
everything just so sucks in my life .
perhaps .
i shld ask the doctor to let me stay longer .

are we really over ?
why do i always regret making decisions .
sigh .
dun meant to break tt time .
but .
i dunno .
why u so cold now .
haiz .
u dun love me anymore ?
are we over lerx ?

whee ........
who can be happier than me .
at this right moment .
everything is cfm .
ticket has bought le .
end of nov .
and i be back home sweet home .
whee .
just so happy .
at this moment .
hw i hope tmr is the day .
lolz .
can't wait to meet my mr right .
haha .
u knew who are u .
lolz .
no nd to mention ur name liao .
u regular reader .
lolz .
but .
but .
my family .
seems not happy .
sigh .
nobody is happy .
sigh .

tot so much things .
guess one sentence is right .
"leopard will never change its spot "
i said so much .
nth is done from u .
all u say is change topic .
haiz .
since like tt .
i think .
wo men hai shi fen shou ba .
zai jian le .
if u reali want me to turn back .
do something .

thankx for all this weeks .
anything can still sms me

sigh .
i wonder .
what position am i in ur heart .
today is my off day .
yet u tell me u wan go rest early .
sigh .
except for sleeping .
don't u have me .
haiz .
i dunno .
it starts to make me wonder .
it should be the same when i back to sg .
slp .
slp .
slp .
haiz .
u said i am in ur heart .
frankly speaking .
i DON'T fucking feeling it at all .!
the first sentence of urs .
is all about u .
when did u ask hw am i .
did i slp well .
concern about me .
no !!
u are so da nan ren !
and .
SELF-CENTERED !
the both is the most i hate it !
and can't tolerate !
even my worst ex .
did better .
at least he was sweet and nice to me during the so-called honeymoon period .
but u .
nothing .
u go and ask ur frenz .
who in this world will like their partner like this .
nobody lohx .
who doesn't one who will dote her .
hong her .
make her happy and blissful .

good news .
i will be back in sg for gd .
in 3 mths time !
ask my uncle to help me book ticket for nov le .
hee .
waiting for his news .
can't wait for see dar dar .
miss him so much .
hopefully .
we will get better .
hopefully .
we will be sweet sweet love .
muackz .

haha .
tell u not to think too much .
practically telling everyone not to think too much .
but myself .
i yet think alot .
i can advise others .
listen and analyze the prob .
but mine .
i cannot do anything .
i got lost .
why .
haha .
fake laugh .
boo .

u are so silly ..
why u go and eat an mian yao ..
why u will get involved in another girl ..
third party ..
why are u becoming like ..
one of the baddies in the show ..
heard ur voice ..
i just cannot help but cry quietly ..
hopefully ..
u nvr hear me cry .
i miss u bro .
pls recover soon .
and change .
dun think too much .
and DUN EVER BE SO SILLY !!

is emo supposedly like this ??
feeling happy sometimes ..
feeling sad ..
haiz ..
now ..
i wondering ...
are we heavenly match-made couple ..
i like a guy who will pamper me ..
i like a guy who will hong me ..
i like a guy who will makes me feel i am a princess ...
but ..
however ...
u are not like tt ..
ytd we had a small quarrel ..
i tot u would said sorry or try to hong wo ..
but ..
in the end .
is i say first ..
i dun mind .
but .
at least bother to really make me feel u reali love me .
pls .
and not my ur mouth or what .
haiz .
sucky feeling .
sometimes is not i want to be so harsh on u or what .
i just dun wan u to feel that .
i love u more than u love me .
and i dun wan it to happen .
cause its tiring .
so i am forcing myself not to bother abt things at times .
haiz .
sorry .
i doesn't want to hear "sorry" from u always .
i also do want to hear other sentences .
and actions .

i am so xin fu ..
my darling tolerated my unreasonables ..
my darling is trying to change ..
my darling loves me more than i love myself ..
my darling give in to me ..
my darling makes me i am a little princess ..
my darling does tiny things which will make me happy ..
my darling trying to understand me ..
tho i have alot of ex .. none .. and reali none .. will read my blog every single day .. no ex will do that .. but ..
my darling did ..
my darling putting his effort ..
i love my darling lots ..
don worry darling ..
in my heart now and future ..
will be one and only guy ..
who is YOU !!!
kenny lee ..
lolz .. my darling ..
darling .. i promise from today onwards i will not give up okie .. love u muackz .. but hor .. sometimes ... u reali bu hui hong wo lei .. haiz .. sobxsobx .. shld learn hw to hong wo kaixin okie .. just like i did .. hahaa .. somethings .. u dunno .. lolz .. u will know when the time is ripe .. alrights .. muackz !! huggiez ..

hearing my bro is gettin better ..
my heart really happier. .
but ..
still kind of worried ..
still wondering ..
i have to make so many decisions
whether to join my collugues for the wireless internet ..
or not ..
if yes,
i ahve to pay for 90 pounds
it is for a yr ..
but i scared ..
i will be gg back for abt 2 weeks time
then it will be a waste ..
sigh ..
hw ..

do u know how i feel now ..
no matter everyday ..
afternoon or night ..
how tired i am ..
i dun dare to slp ..
just afraid that u will wake up ..
and i wanted to talk to u ..
but what i get was ..
eversince i know u ..
u are the first in my mind ..
everyday ..
i will call u b4 i call my family ..
but what i get ..
perhaps its my life ...
i dunno ..
perhaps its so silly of me ..
to think that we are so perfect being tgr ..
even in the middle of the night ..
when i am slping ..
i will get up a few times,
just to check whether u wake up anot ..
i am tired of all this le ....
my family has given me enuff probs ..
but yet u did not an wei me ..
just keep thinkign of ur phone ...
u din ask me not to slp ..
but i miss u badly ..
just wan to talk to u ..
and want to find someone to talk to ..
even u are not here for me ..
who can be here ..
even i cry ..
i have to cry in silence ..
i feel so tong ku ..

nobody will actually know how i truely feel ..
tho everyone says "yes.. i understand"
but ..
deep right inside nobody knows .. sigh ..
perhaps i have to be stronger ..
so that my parents has one thing to worry ..

what could i do .. anybody can tell me what can i do now ..
seeing everyone is in pain ..
my heart aches ..
yet ..
i cannot do anything ..
feeling so useless ..
why ..
why is all this happening to my family ...
my brother attempted suicide ..
why .. why .. why ..
i dunno ..
shld i go back now ..
or like what i told my parents ..
if two weeks time ..
and bro is still in hospital ..
i shall immediately go back ..
and not wait for nov or jan ...
but .........
i reali feel lk flying back NOW ..
haiz ...
somehow ..
i heard ..
he and my sis-in-law ..
are going to diveorce ..
just din sign the papers ..
luckily enuff ..
things can still turn back ..
why is my brother so silly ..
ask for a divorce at the lawyer place ..
and now my sis-in-law really want to divorce ..
then he start to gan-chiong ..
and do silly things ..
why ..
my parents said ..
he looks so weak and thin now ...
my used-to-be strong, muscular brother..
has gone .........
my parents are so heart pain ..
i can hear from their voice ..
i cried in the other end ..
but i dun wan to let them hear ..
i feel so heart break ..
its muz be a dream ..
a bad dream ..
i will wake up from this bad dream one day ..
its ONLY A FUCKING DREAM!!!!!!!!!
i think i am the next one going to be breakdown ..
my family seem to have falling apart ..
NO!!!

i am sorry .. sorry if i had hurt u in other way .. sorry for everything .. things are so unpredictable .. one day we are fine .. whu noes the next day .. we might be just left living for only 3 mths .. nobody can ever expect this to happen .. i am sorry .. reali sorry ..
ps: tho our days are short .. but it is nice to once had u in my heart .. and u once had me in ur heart .. ilu ..

its not fair!!! not fair!!!!!
i am the youngest .. does it mean that i cannot know anything ...
i know i cannot be of any help ..
can't i just concern ..
why does everyone treating me like a 3 yr old kid ..
my heart breaks ..
i am useless to the family .. with or without me .. there is no difference at all ..
why .. why can't just anybody tell me the whole picture ..
like what u said i am part of the family ..
but why nobody is treating me like one ..
everyone seems to be hiding this and hiding that ..
i am reali tired of guessing ard ..
asking in vain ..
sometimes i wish not to go back sg ..
since i am nobody to anybody at all ..
with or without me ..
there is no difference ..
my family members said that ..
can u fucking imagine ..
my family member lor ..
haiz ..
the feeling is jus so sux ..
why can't anyone tell me the fucking whole story ..
what actually happen ...
are u all happy that one day ..
i say ...
i dun fucking care anymore ..
is that what u all want to hear ...
if is it, just simply tell me ..
真的累了