whee .
finally i am blogging after so many days huh .
was at my new working place .
unable to steal wireless till now lor .
haha .
well .
decided not to go back liao .
gonna extend .
till my visa ends .
perhaps or rather say .
i am avoiding my problems at sg ba .
well .
i got so many problems at my family now .
just dun understand why .
why my brother will cheat my money .
so little money only .
3000 sgd .
haiz .
anw .
gonna surf web b4 no more wwireless .
tata

i dunno what is my next step .
i have left my working place .
now finding a new job .
dunno will i be able to find any .
or simply can't .
if not,
i think i will go back sg in 2 weeks time .
probably asap .
i tot i could ren but no more .
told my boss .
i will nt work for u anymore .
i hope to leave by tmr (i told him ytd night)
he tried to leave me .
but i said no more i could able to tolerate .
hence,
he let me leave without any condition .
hence i can't update blog anymore .
if there is chance,
i will try to .
sorry for bu gao er bie .

"if time could turn back, i would not make the same mistakes"

was looking at papers ytd .
saw eee pc .
we had brk off .
but why do i still wan to buy the laptop for u as a surprise .
i dunno .
perhaps everything went deeply wrong .
so wrong .
i might not see u at the end .
but why do i hope to still hug u tight .
din managed to slp till 6am .
saw u online ,
wanted to talk to u .
but suan le .
din talk to u in the end .
thinking u might be bz .
i am so sick .
sore throat .
flu .
cough .
block nose .
fever .
every single shit u could get ,
its on my body now .
feeling so xxing ku .
tts why i wanna go back sg .
i almost had fits ytd night .
u noe la .
the symptoms .
probably is too cold and i am too agitated .
dunno la .

o ya.
on a happier side .
i finally finish my drama show .
hk de .
i still yet unable to dwl the sg show .
haiz .
sobx .
i mean last episode .

tts all for my last post .

i reali dunno what to do .
haiz .
my mind is in a lost .
so many things to do .
so little time .
haiz .
i think the chef like me lor .
he has been teasing me every single day .
then we always dou zui every min .
haha .
as if we had big en yuan .
lols .
1 mre mths and 18 week .
lols .
i tot of going back early .
but my mum says .
coming back early not a prob .
but ask me to see a doc if not well .
cause if sick,
sit plane very xing ku .
then she say and say .
my bro at the background says .
aiyo . mother u so naggy .
and my dad become a power ranger .
lols .
use a massage stick to hit my mum head to give her "power"
lols .
reali miss our days as a family .
its been sometimes since we went for a picnic .
when i get back,
gonna organise a sun picnic for everyone .
haha .
family gathering is important .
a simple and nice picnic .
=) .
miss my bros, and family .
haiz .
has been talking to alex, my ex for this few days .
realise perhaps i had misunderstood him for brking up tt yr .
suddenly miss the days we had .
its happy moments .
haiz .
but what is past is past liao .
no more turning back .
regarding my job,
perhaps i shall change .
be on time,
behave myself .
i dun wish to change anymore job .
i am reali happy with this job .
my uncle says if i be on time, and behave,
perhaps i still can stay here but .
dunno for how long .
but i guess if i change,
my boss wun "fired" me ba .
hope so .
i go rest liao .

i dreamt of him yytd night .
lols .
dreamt the days we spent tgr .
dunno why also .
perhaps i have been trying to escape all this while .
dunno .
confused .
u had deleted all my friendster comment for u .
guess it has clearly stated .
guess u wun ever read my blog ever again .
guess u had deleted me from msn as well .
guess we wun ever contact again .
if that is the case,
i wish u all the best my fren.
hopefully we are still fren .
=)
cannot be lover still can be fren loh .
cheers .
trying to stay happy .
seriously .
i now tot of pushing forward my return to sg date .
i reali feel so unhappy and sick here .
everything sux .
emo~

looking at my frenz .
all happily in love .
spending their free time with their love ones .
i am reali so envy .
when could i ever ever find that guy .
perhaps not even i die .
=(
i still do love u .
but i will let go of u .
i wun ask for any patch anymore .
no more .
if fate were to come,
i think even if we were to avoid it also cannot lah .
so might as well .
let u go first .
u might find a better girl .
a girl who can share ur problems with .
take care my dear fren.
i am glad that he found a girl he loves .
thinking of the memories we used to share .
i believe this girl muz be very fortunate .
treasure her .

i chose to leave not because i did anything wrong .
i dun wan anymore probs for my uncle .
thats it .
i reali dun understand .
haiz .
perhaps i am being too impatient and careless .
and now trouble is here .
ever since i came here .
i brought plenty of troubles to my uncles and aunties .
i know that in their heart .
they hope i will go back asap .
and not stay here any longer .
so they will have peace .
i dun meant to bring so much troubles .
serious .
haiz .
i am just a useless person .
when i die,
i will be go to 18th hell .
haiz .
worth me of dying sooner .
no regrets .

be it u,
wei qiang,
raymond,
all of u will be part of my memories from now on .
i will learn how to move forward without u all .
i know i can make it .
memories means past and cannot be the future .
=)
read angie blog .
haha .
she was saying when i am back can go beach tgr .
yeah .
suddenly kanna miss the moments we had tgr .
and of cause,
even if its bff,
we will tend to quarrel at times too .
and no sooner,
we are fine,
chatting and enjoying away .
i wonder how is she .
fatter or skinner .
lols .
so thin liao .
if still skinner,
i reali cannot imagine lor .
haha .
all those memories i had with my dearest fren,
including,
happy,
sad,
angry,
are all so precious to me .
cause not everyone will have these memories like me .
i am fortunate enuff .
anw .
gtg .
5 more weeks .
omg .
time flies .
i yet to save lots of money .
except for the 5k i dun intend to touch at all .
putting for small investment .
lols !
haha .
tata !
missall

if my fren rmb me of saying i am gg back on nov,
i am having a second tot of not going back so fast .
i wan to escape .
i dun wish to face my family so fast .
i dun wish to see my family prob so fast .
i yet to do so many things here .
1. quit smoking
2. save money
3. bring my parents here
4. buyy LV
so so many things .
anw.
buying of LV is not as impt as the first three .
sometimes,
i see so many ppl die .
why not me .
i see so many ppl having cancer
why not me .
perhaps i had cancer.
jsut that i dunno .
cause i NEVER EVER went for a full body check up .
i am afraid of knowing the truth .
perhaps .
its time for me to do so when i get back to sg .
do a thorough full body check-up .
at least if i had any cancer,
i have time to prepare my own funeral .
haha .
i hinted my uncle.
if i die,
i wan a pink lovely coffin with teddy bears .
surrounding muz be pink .
so at least when i suddenly pass away,
he will know what to do .
life is so unpredictable .
u wun know what happen next .
anw .
aiya.
shit .
forget what to say liao .
oh ya .
ytd called angie .
suddenly i dunno why .
i felt that we are so far apart .
we like have nothing much to say .
or chat .
haiz .
bad bad .
bad feeling .
my palce tv license due liao .
no more tv while working .
getting so bored lor!
wah lao eh .
haiz .
rotting .
oh ya .
the kitchen chefs .
two la .
quite nice and rich and handsome .
seems to be interested in me leh .
cause both dated me out .
lols .
and kip teasing me .
making me laugh .
lols .
haha .
so hua chi .
downloading my shows now .
no more shows to watch .
sianzzzz

i know it will be the best for both of us in this way .
we wun be wasting any more time or money on each other .
everything came too fast .
maybe i will rather admit .
i scared of lonely .
but i haven get rdy for another r/s
i am scared of lonely thats why i be ur gf .
till time passes ,
i gradually fall in love with u .
but now as i have cooled down .
i should not be so selfish .
i should let u go and find ur own girl .
a girl who u will treasure and cherish .
so .
this morning .
i had told u my decision .
its better for us to become fren .
i know its tough for me .
but i will overcome it .
my family needs more of my love and concern .
i wan to spend more time with my family and frenz .
perhaps,
in the future ,
we will get back tgr .
i rmb the last time i mention brk,
i cried like nobody .
but today .
when i got ur reply ,
i just smiled to myself .
as it proves my decision is right .
i would bother by who u add,
what u do,
what u buy .
i dun wan to feel like being used by u .
cheating my feelin .
just like my past ex .
anw .
all the best .
jiayou

hello!!!!
think i haven blog for ard 1 week liao hor .
anyone still reading my blog?
i doubt so .
haiz .
6 more weeks and i m going back liao .
i am reali looking forward to that day .
but sometimes i reali dun wish to go back .
sian .
dunno why .
family too many probs .
i wan to run away .
haiz .
but its my family overall .
why does my second bro still dun change .
but what i hope is he dun con my dad anymore money .
he has no money le lor .
i dunno lah .
sometimes i hope i am the one who get con not my parents .
but anw .
forget it .
i cut my bloody fingers in two days .
ytd was the most serious de lor .
haiz .
one piece of meat gonez .
sobs .
my finger now so pain when touch water or slightly touch it lor.
haiz .
its been months since u told me tt .
whenever u find me is only when u needed my help .
sometimes i can't help but to feel that u are using me onli .
i dunno .
seriously .
i have been thinking of days .
have u ever love me .
do u know how to love someone .
what are u actually thinking .
all is i dunno .
of cause i hope the real truth is not my instinct .
anw .
have bene watching so many shows .
from sg and hk .
one is the latest 9pm show at channel 8
second one is 与敌同行
not bad la .
downloading the shows .
that why i am here blogging .
nobody have been asking me why i haven update .
probably nobody cares .
sux .
ciaoz

flu .
fever .
cough .
sore throat .
i got all this stupid shit now .
time reali reali flies .
i rmb i bought my ticket 3 mths ago .
everyone was telling me .
wah .
u so early buy .
then now .
1 more mth and 18 days .
i going back liao .
everyone tell me .
i so she bu de u go back lor .
haiz .
but my sg fren all wanted me to go back .
but whats the point .
i think no diff lor .
i feeling so sick now .
haiz .
think about it .
abit .
abit la .
abit regret buying my ticket so early .
recently nothing to blog .
so wun blog as often liao .
ok la .
tmr nd wake up early .
go slp liao .
had my off day today .
slept the whole day .
lols .

seriously .
i rmb i did say i am not going to blog anymore .
but why am i still here everyday .
ok .
almost everyday .
mayb got used to it liao ba .
haha .
have been asking myself this question .
how long have i and bf been tgr .
can that date count as the first day tgr .
or mayb i should treat it as "friends" .
then the day when we first met .
i will then say the official day tgr ba .
or else i feel very weird lei .
lolx .
dar u so pig lor .
sleep the whole day .
zhuxzhuz .
lazy pig .
=p
sometimes the feeling of quarrelling with dar .
makes me happy .
aha .
weird.
at least there os someone to quarrel with ba .
at least it means that he bother to quarrel with me ba .
better than bo chap .
lols .
muackz .
he so silly .
dunno why see my tag can see hush brown .
lols .

everyone tends to regret after things had gone the way they dun wish to .
but at times ,
its too late to regret .
just like me bro and my few other frenz .
just treasure their love one .
then when they lost them,
they start crying and suiciding ..
haiz .
seeing everyone my side are like tt .
makes me want to treasure my bf more and more .
we had gone thru ups and downs .
quarrelling , happiness .
ivy asked me .
what! u date ur bf just on net onli? nvr meet b4 wan ahh ?!
i say ya .
then she says how to pa tuo like tt .
i say why cannot .
as long as our heart and mind are tgr why not .
then she diam diam .
lols .
i know we yet to met b4 .
but all this is fate lor .
if not of tt day i am bored,
and suddenly finding someone online to chat .
i wun have met u .
so i am happy with it now .
love u lots dar .
bf is now worried for his driver .
his driver kanna accident .
haven wake up since ytd 5+am .
abt 48 hrs liao .
then ytd bf says he no mood to talk and dun wan to quarrel .
i dun wan to quarrel .
i just jokin with him .
but he cannot get it .
sigh .
i am so sad .
ytd couz came back,
play ard .
haha .
tata .
go rest .
later nd to work liao .
muackz .